One more research paper to write and I will be graduating!

Graduation in MC is on May 09-11.

I am suppose to be excited but I just don't feel it. All I can feel right now is burdened -- physically, mentally, emotionally and the one word I hate to mention... FINANCIALLY BURDENED!

It is not a statement of complain, rather it is reality in life that you have to (or at least choose to) go through. Hobbit and I have chosen this path, thus we trust God to get us through it.

Recently, someone told me off by saying "If you are tight on money, why not ask your parents to help? You wouldn't be sacrificing all the things you can have in life!" Well, this person is grousing why I can't go shopping with her and seldom hang around with their group! The heck...of course I couldn't. I am a working, independent and some more a married sexy! Why should I be living out of my parents' pocket? Even if they offered to help, a grown-up should be wise up on it. I'm not proud of what sort of independent I am but I am so darn proud that I can finally control myself on spending (I am a spendthrift!) and pay off all my financial burdens with my own sweat! Darn am I so proud! I now can speak up to that who said "kau senang bah...semua pun ibubapa bagi...bukan macam saya! (It's easy for you...your parents give you everything...unlike me!)" Until now he still thinks that our kereta buruk (age-old car) was paid by my parents because he said obviously Hobbit and I cannot afford the wedding, our masters and kereta buruk at the same time. All I could do was laugh!

I look up to all my family/friends who go/went through college/university with their own hard-earned money. The percentage of my empathy is no longer the same. I look up to people who stick to what they believe in and to those who never stop from dreaming big. How I envy those at their 40s or 50s haven't died on their dreams on getting a bachelor's degree just because they couldn't afford financially back then. I look up to those who say "lets wait" to get back on education because they know that it is not the status that matters and that there are other things far more important in life that has to come first. This talk "...mau juga dua dua ambil masters! (...why both doing masters at the same time?)" This to me is jealousy and lack understanding on "priority". Hey chap, if you are our friend, be happy and pray for us lah! If you cannot accept how we live our lives, I still say...live with it!

I am bitching out because I was just hit by a bomb AGAIN while chatting with someone. I am just not ready to make nice!

Hey friend, if you happen to read this, don't take it deep deep in your heart *_*. I don't mean to return your kind bomb, I just want to have a say. You can say anything to me good or bad but don't repeat it too many times if it is bad. Once said, I can already understand because once I lost my respect for you, I really will have nothing left. It's up to you to earn it back yourself. For me, it's worth keeping friends that build me up, not the ones that pull me down.

By the way friends, I am not going to march this year instead I am postponing it to next year's graduation as so I could march with my beloved Hobbit. Oh, recently Hobbit helped me with my IT papers (since I am so dumb with IT stuff)and now he is sleepless doing his. After all, isn't it every husband's job to carry the burden of the wife?? LOL!